Parenting as solicited by my friends on Facebook

Every once in awhile my friends will send out a call for help on Facebook wondering about how to do something with their kids. I have even done this on occasion to ask about a product to buy, etc. It's like your own source of reviews from people you know and trust. Actually, as I type that out I am thinking I should really use Facebook more often for these kinds of questions. But no matter, I learn from my friends asking questions on facebook. Here is a list of some of my favorite responses that I may (try) to put into action one day (most of them from my friend who just became a foster parents...dove in head first). I've listed the advice by category and will add to it as posts arise. 

According to FB friends of friends: 

When traveling: 

-If your child is old enough, expose them to a new show and then have some episodes of that show for the plane

-Give your child a little treat/present every 30 mins on the flights

-Free toddler apps/games (like drawing and piano)

How to get your child to stay in their room until a certain time: 

-provide them with a list of activities that they can do before mom and dad get up. One suggestion: have them make their own breakfast with their own drawer that has their bowl, etc. 

-Reinforce good behavior and i quote

'Gotta find a high value "reward" to change behavior. Punishment is not the way we work and for her, might very well cause a whole host of other problems issues. We use positive reinforcement (paired with a neg consequence for neg/dangerous behavior sometimes). If you can find something really motivating, you can save that for following the rule. Loves to back brownies? Stay in your room till 6 a.m. get a brownie ticket. Get 3 tickets...bake brownies w mom! No baking brownies other times. Save high value activities and things for those times. You can't expect 100% compliance and you should take this in steps. If she usually wakes up at 4:30, don't expect 6 or 7 a.m., that's too long. Start with 5. There are plenty of good behavior mgmt books for parents, I know several have been mentioned. '

Consequences of rule breaking: 

-the 1-2-3 magic book to you? It's very helpful w incentivizing good behavior and curbing bad behavior. Until you get your hands on the book, when she breaks the rules, take away her favorite "things" or privileges (tv time, dress up time, etc.). Needs to happen directly after she breaks the rule so she associates the privilege being taken away.

-For us positive praise works so much better than negative discipline. There are situations of course we were need that but try to remember to focus on positive at other times. Before any situation (even the start of a day) we go over expected behaviors and when its over praise for following expectations. Reward charts also work great - stickers or for big things the chance to buy a toy, pick an outing, etc

-When we have bad behavior and rule breaking, I try to ask myself why the thing is happening - is it because they don't believe there will be consequences, or because their brain has somehow tweaked out and they can't get it together? At 5, for me, my answer to that question changes. My responses to behavior problems range from losing privileges to putting an overstimulated 5yo in a warm lavender bath or from (very) early bed time to rocking in the rocking chair with me to get a grip and re-center a little.